I was rather down lately. Again..
However, instead of pouring out my sorrows, I swallowed them all down. I guess, they all got stuck in my throat.
I tossed and turned, I struggled like a fish that is out of water. Trying to find its way back to the streams. It was uncomfortable. A horrible feeling. I was as good as dead. I guess that was called, "dying to self".
I began to realise the state of my spiritual health. The root of all evil comes from the heart.
"Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life. " ~ Proverbs 4:23 (NKJV)
Yes, that's right, I have allowed Bitterness to consume my life. Bitterness is like Streptococcus pyogenes, a small, unseen to naked eye, "flesh-eating" bacteria, that slowly eats you up from the inside.
Usually the infections (Necrotizing fasciitis) caused by these bacteria are mild. But these bacteria does produce toxins that can damage the soft tissue below the skin and cause a more dangerous infection that can spread quickly along the tissue covering the muscle (fascia). The bacteria also can travel through the blood to the lungs and other organs, causing more implications.
Bitterness is that thief the devil has sent. He steals your life away and leave you with nothing left. He takes away your peace and your joy and left you rotting in your flesh.
I have been through many defeats, many failures and many loses. All those left me with great pain and bitter grief. Dealing with those pain are never easy. Sometimes, they are just too much for one man to handle.
The biblical Greek words for "Bitter" is PIKROS and "Bitterness" is PIKRIA. PIKROS originally meant "sharp", or "pointed". Then it was used more generally for anything that was penetrating to the senses, something that had a pervasive smell or a "shrill" noise. PIKRA was used for the bitterness of the taste of some plants, and finally found use in speaking of personal experience when something was unpleasant, undesirable, or when something bad was unexpected.
The funny side of life is this:
You are bitter because life was not kind and not fair towards you. Yet to defeat Bitterness from stealing from you, you got to bow down to life and apologise for being bitter. Well, that is the Kingdom of God. Always doing the opposite to achieve something. Give and you get, sow and you reap, fight to draw closer, forgive and you are forgiven, and die to yourself so that you can live for eternity.
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